Caring About Sex and Disability During the Holiday Season

Well, hello, dear reader, and welcome to another instalment of Caring About Sex and Disability!

As we hurtle towards the holiday season, it can be a strange and challenging time for many of us – especially for those of us living with disabilities or injuries. For some, this time of year may bring up bittersweet memories of life before disability. For others, the challenges lie in the financial pressures – disability is expensive, disability supports are never enough, and the added stress of buying gifts can feel overwhelming.

In today’s issue, I want to explore ways you can give thoughtful, low-cost gifts as a disabled person. These ideas won’t break the bank and can still allow you to feel like you’ve contributed to the holiday season. Let’s dive in!

Lunch or Dinner with Friends

If money is tight this holiday season and you’re worried about buying gifts, one of my favourite options is spending time with loved ones. Consider taking a friend to lunch or dinner where you can chat, share your experiences of how disability impacted you in 2024, or avoid the topic altogether if that feels better.

As someone with a very visible disability, I love taking friends to meals. It’s a reminder that while I might need help with my food, I can still be amazing company. If eating out isn’t an option, you could host a potluck or cook together. Sharing a meal is an opportunity to create lasting memories, and for me, those moments hold so much more value than anything material.

Pillows

If you’re like me and have a lot of disabled friends, you know rest is vital. A pillow can be a simple yet thoughtful gift. Personally, I love taking afternoon naps in my wheelchair, and a good pillow makes all the difference.

Pillows can be used for so many things: positioning, resting, or even better sex! They’re an inexpensive way to show your friends that their comfort and well-being matter to you. For a fun twist, you can even get customised pillows with faces or designs on them – maybe of their favourite celebrity crush? Just a thought!

Grabbers and Grab Bars Galore

One gift I’d love to give all my friends, disabled or not, is a grabber. As a wheelchair user, I often visit friends’ homes and struggle to reach things. A grabber – a metal tool with a claw at the end – has been life-changing for me. It’s inexpensive but makes a world of difference for independence.

Similarly, grab bars for toilets and showers can be a game-changer for accessibility. Many disabled people avoid visiting friends’ homes due to a lack of access. Grabbers and grab bars are affordable (less than $30 each online), and gifting them is a gentle way to show that access is love.

Sex Toys

Let’s be real – everyone deserves good sex over the holidays, right? A sex toy could be a cheeky yet thoughtful gift. Nowadays, there are plenty of affordable options, including discreet designs that don’t look like sex toys at all.

If you’re buying for a disabled friend, sex toys can also double as excellent tools for chronic pain relief – so it’s a win-win! Maybe consider gifting one to a friend who’s on the “naughty” list this year.

Drinking Straws

One of the best, most practical gifts you can give is a pack of drinking straws. The number of times I’ve been at parties or events with no way to hydrate myself is far too many to count. A pack of drinking straws is more than affordable and ensures that you and your friends can stay hydrated at all your festive gatherings. It’s a small gesture, but it makes a big difference in accessibility.

Care Rehab Gift Cards

Finally, if you know someone who could benefit from support, consider pitching in for a Care Rehab counselling gift card. For someone experiencing grief or loss related to disability, this could be a meaningful gift that helps them process their journey and reconnect with their body post-disability.

Some gifts are simply too important to be wrapped, and this might be one of them.

I hope this list has given you some inspiration for thoughtful, low-cost gifts this holiday season. Remember, you don’t have to feel left out or burdened by the pressure of giving. Wishing you the best holiday season, and I’ll see you in 2025 for more Caring About Sex & Disability!

Until next time. Thanks for caring about sex and disability with me.

Andrew Gurza